Sunday Ramblings...

I went to bed last night thinking I'd get to sleep in, do a little laundry, go shopping, and just relax. Yeah, right.

I woke up at 9:00 and noticed I missed a text message. David's partner had texted me to call him - that David got sick at work. I guess he woke up about 2:00 with major abdominal pain. About 3:00 he went up to the ER because he was puking and other stuff... The doctor ordered an Xray because his pain was a little higher than he thought it should be for the flu - he was thinking gull bladder or possible bowel obstruction. Luckily between that a bunch of blood work, he decided it's "just" the flu.

2 of his coworkers had this this week - and slept in the bed he slept in for the last 2 nights. They, of course, decided not to disinfect or wipe anything down. The sheets were changed, but that's it. David was just lucky enough to catch this while he was at work. The doctor thinks that, because he's still dealing with the bronchitis, his immune system was low so it hit him harder than the other 2 guys.

He obviously wasn't up to working his shift or driving home. So, my dad and I drove out there to get him and his car. He ended up with tons of pain meds, anti-nausea, and 3 bags of fluid. We stopped at the grocery store to get lots of fluids, popsicles, and chicken broth. I also got him TheraFlu, Immodium, and a 'script for Reglan from Walgreens. Now he's passed out on the couch under 2 comforters and 2 blankets. I'm trying to stay away from him so I don't get it, but I figure I probably will... fingers crossed not until the end of the week!

I was supposed to go shopping today for clothes. I had a coupon from New York & Company that expires today. The friend that was going to go had to bail, and I didn't want to leave David. So I shopped online. I spent a little more than I had planned but I got 2 pants and 2 tops. I'm excited to get my clothes in a week. Then I'll have a "fashion show" for you!

And my last randomness for the day... When I was at the grocery store getting popsicles, I noticed Weight Watchers has new ice cream things! Fruit popsicle with vanilla ice cream - I LOVE those things, and now they are healthy! Oh, and you know how Snicker's has their ice cream bars? Well, Weight Watchers has their own! They are 3 points, which is a little higher than I usually like to go for sweets, but they will be so worth it!

And then, I decided to get Frosty Paws. Have you seen these? They are dog-safe ice cream treats! They come in individual cups and I've heard good things about them. My sister and brother in law give their dogs these yummy treats about once a week. In fact, Shammy can open her own cup if you start it just a little bit! I thought today would be a good day to try these - instant entertainment for the dogs. They LOVED them. I got the original flavor. Max immediately took his outside, and Allie tried to enjoy her's in the recliner. I vetoed that. Toby eventually ate his laying on David's feet (David finally warmed up a little!). They were gone in less than 30 minutes and I had happy puppies with dirty faces! I think these are going to be a common entertainment/treat around our house! :-)

Getting back to it...

David and I made the decision last month to cancel our gym membership with Prairie Life. I absolutely love the gym, the classes, the pool, the people.... everything! But, it's a 30 min drive from us and it's expensive. So, we decided to join Anytime Fitness. There is one about 5 minutes from our house and David loves that he can go ANYTIME he wants. You get a key faub that will get you in 24 hours a day. It isn't staffed very often - 6-8 hours a day - and there are no classes. It's nothing special, but it has equipment that we don't have at home. And it's $40 cheaper than Prairie Life! David said I can get some more work out videos so that I get my "classes" in. I already have 2 of Leslie Sansone's walking, a Pilates/Yoga video, and a Wedding Workout. But, I want to get a Tae Bo and maybe another Walking Video. I'm hoping to get my knee strong enough that I can do the 30 Day Shred with Jillian Michaels. I'm also going to get some hand weights to work on muscles when I'm doing arm moves with the walking video.

So, I haven't worked out since before I got sick. #1 - no time. #2 - I got sick and had surgery. No way that was going to happen! So, I went tonight for the first time. I grabbed one of the emergency "necklaces" just in case. You push the button and 911 gets called. I was the only one there, so it was peace of mind for me.... I made it 10 minutes on the Elliptical! Granted, it was only at 3.7, when I used to go 30 min at 5.1 or higher. It felt good to get back to it. I'm planning on doing 10 min every other day for a week to 10 days. Then, I'll up it to 15-20 min, and so on...

I also want to start the Couch to 5K program again. I had started it before I got sick in July and never started again. I'm hoping the elliptical and some treadmill will build my knees up to complete it. I also need to get new shoes, but the ones I have are doing the job until my birthday (I hope).

It kills me that I'm back to being where I was when I first started working out. But, I know that I have to listen to my body if I want to get healthy again!! I have just under 10 lbs to go before I'm at my goal. I'd love to be fit enough to wear a size 10 and be toned. I'll get there. It will just take time!

That's about it for this post... I bought a bottle of wine today and I'm gonna go get a new outfit tomorrow - or a couple tops for work, depending on what I find! I just need clothes that fit! Everything is too big, or if it fits, it's wintery. I can't wear sweaters when it's 70 degrees outside!

Family Pictures!

David and I had pictures taken at the end of January. After mix-ups from the post office, lost emails and phone numbers, we got our pictures! My friend, Summer, did an awesome job! We did them at home so the dogs could "participate." They didn't cooperate as planned, but we got a few cute ones, plus lots with just us. As you look, you have to remember something about my husband: he doesn't smile unless he's laughing. Seriously. Even at our wedding, he didn't smile for the portraits - yeah, he smiled throughout the day, but the only pictures he was actually smiling in were the random ones. Portraits? Nope! He freezes and goes all serious. Sometimes, he smiles with his eyes. But, this time, he decided he wanted to be random and not even look at Summer very often! Men! ;-)

2nd Opinion

Today, David and I went to see my GP, who has been my doctor since moving to Nebraska in 1996. She knows my family history (probably better than me!) and is upfront and honest. I had to see a student just to see her - she didn't have any appointments until next week. But, she's "staffing," so the students consult with her and then she'll see the patient if necessary. Of course, she had to see me!

Basically we decided:
* I'm not eating enough fiber. Why? Because my stomach hurts.
* My stomach hurts when I eat because the acid is eating my stomach. I'm not eating enough food, because I CAN'T, but that is hurting me!

So, we're doing this:
* Zantac 2 times a day to help the acid
* Fiber powder 1 time a day
* Continue the Miralax 1 time a day (opposite the fiber)

BUT, here's how this is different: If I am not feeling better in 2 days, she will squeeze me in on Friday. She thought about doing another x-ray to see if the "poop block" has gotten out at all or if it's still there. But, she is guessing that, if it's not gone, the fiber/laxative/zantac will help get rid of it. And, even if I'm feeling better, if I'm not pooping regularly again in a week she wants to see me. Wow, you mean, you're going to solve the problem, not just mask it??? Wow!

So, she diagnosed me with gastrointeritis and constipation. My stomach lining is getting inflamed because of the acid in my stomach. If I can get my stomach calmed down, I can eat enough fiber and get myself regular again. She said that IBS is more or less an everything-else-ruled-out disease, and since I didn't have signs of Celiac's at my colonoscopy in August, I probably don't have that. She said I could, in theory have IBS, but if we can get it under control now, I should be fine. Fingers Crossed!

Oh, and she complimented me on my weight loss! I'm back down to where I was right before I got sick. She was very proud of me and said I looked awesome. She asked me how many inches I lost and was even more impressed that I've gone from an 18W to a 12! I told her that my personal goal is to get 5 lbs below where she wants me. That way, I do have a little room for mistakes/body fluxuations and to find the sustainable weight for my body! She agreed and said she can't wait to see me in a few months when I go in for my med check.

Not that this is getting too long or anything, but... David and I joined a new gym today. I absolutely love Prairie Life and I already miss it. But, Anytime Fitness is right down the street from us and has 24 hr access. The gym is clean, has 2 private showers and 2 private bathrooms. They do offer personal training - limited hours, but they are there. And, we are saving $40 a month! I'm going to build my video collection and set up a schedule. I want to start the C25K again as soon as I feel my body is ready and I will complete it this time! David and I are thinking about finding a 1/2 marathon that we can complete together. Any ideas of a good 1/2 marathon in the Midwest for beginners?

Fun Sunday!

Well, I'm feeling human finally. My stomach is still doing "it's thing" and I have my appointment with my GP on Tuesday. The Miralax hasn't even helped today - nothing is moving, and I'm getting sick to my stomach when I eat. I just took an anti-nausea pill so I can eat in an hour or so!

But, anyways... I went with a friend to the local craft fair! I haven't been to one since I was little, and I had so much fun! I almost got myself into trouble - there was so much fun stuff! So, here is what I got:


Totally cute shirts for my nephews that says "my daddy is my hero." David's brother recently joined the military and is stationed at Ft. Dix. He has seen his papers and can go at anytime... they've been doing training missions to prepare them for Afghanistan or Iraq (I'm not sure where he'll be going). So, we got their two sons adorable shirts to wear!



This is really cool. It's a place mat on one side. On the other side, it's a chalk board. The cool thing? It lasts for forever - they had some sample ones that had been used for over 4 years! The matching bag has a snap so it can keep the box of chalk. Plus, turn it inside out and it becomes an eraser! Even better thing? It can go in the washing machine with towels so if the place mat gets dirty, it's okay. I'll be using this with my tutoring student and my classroom students as well. Can't wait!


This "wine" sign is really cool. The photographer takes pictures in Council Bluffs, Omaha, and Lincoln of different letters found naturally wherever she is. She custom makes stuff, and her interactive website is really fun to put stuff together and place your order. I want to get one with our last name soon! This company is going to be very dangerous for me, I can already tell!


I'm planning on hanging my sign on this wall, next to the wine cabinet. I'm going to get some hanging shelves - either black or the cherry color that the cabinet is - and put our wine glasses from various wineries on those shelves. So excited about my project!

My friend got a really cool purse and a bib to give her parents when she gets pregnant. FXed it gets given soon! :-)

"You don't look good"

I went back to work yesterday. I dealt with the silent treatment from my aide, and I made the mistake of letting the kids hug me while I was standing up. I ended up with a couple heads being "slammed" right into my abdomen. I thought I was feeling better until THAT happened.

I did the colon cleanse on Monday, and it helped a little.... on Monday. Tuesday morning, I started feeling clogged, and realized the clogging was starting back up again. I didn't eat breakfast Tuesday morning because I wasn't hungry and my stomach was upset. I didn't even FEEL hungry until 10:30, and by then, it was almost time for lunch. Lunch? Yeah.... I could barely eat because I started feeling sick again as soon as I started eating, and it was a mild lunch. I ate very little (maybe a 1/3 of what I usually eat), and then couldn't stand the increasing pain anymore. To eat dinner, I had to take Reglan, which is an anti-nausea med. After I ate that I was fine....

So, to the title of this particular post.... I walked in, running a minute or two late, and my principal says "You look too skinny" and asks a Kindergartner to give me his graham crackers! The funny thing? All month I've gained weight, and then lost the same amount, then gained a little, then lost a little.. right now, I'm up about 5 lbs, probably because of the stomach stuff.

As the day goes on, teachers are stopping me and talking to me... Several told me I didn't look like I felt good. One of the parents of my students says "I'm glad you're back but you don't look good!" Gee, thanks.

Today, my second day back.... My para talked to me a little more today! I was observed by my supervisor, which went fine - she warned me about it yesterday. And I made the rule that if the kids wanted to hug me, I had to be sitting down. That saved alot of pain and close calls! A few people told me I looked "better" than yesterday - Thanks, I think? I'm still being told that I'm really skinny and someone told me she was worried about me when she saw me picking at my lunch! Sorry, dealing with stomach issues... not much I can do! But, I still got told that I didn't look good. One teacher even said "Wouldn't it beat it all if you ended up pregnant right now!" Yeah, thanks. I know she doesn't know we're having problems having a baby, but I did say that we had to wait now..... and then she made this comment and I about started crying!

I called the GI doctor again today. His nurse said she would talk to him and call me back. But, guess what? His latest appointment is 4:00 and he's only in clinic one day a week. So, chances are, it's gonna be more time off for me to figure this out... Everybody is telling me what to try to fix the plumbing issues and I finally said "I don't want to mask what's going on. Yeah, it sucks, but I think it will be easier if I just follow what my doctor says."

So, I'm glad to be at work. I come home beyond exhausted and hurting like no other, but I'm back. I ate dinner - no Reglan beforehand - and it didn't upset me too much (still irritable, but not so much that I feel like crying like other meals in the recent past have. Maybe that's progress?

Conferences are next week and I'm overwhelmed. My report cards are due Monday, which really freaks me out. I don't even know my kids anymore! My para is helping get some stuff done, so that's nice. But, I just don't have the energy to work on them at home, and I only have 45 min a day that I can work on them, and that's also my time to get other stuff done. EEK! I know it will be okay, but it's going to be a L.O.N.G. week!

"Wait and See"

So here's my vent post for the month. It will probably get long because I have alot of bottled up frustration..... Ready?

I went to see the GI specialist today. Guess what he said? Do this, wait a couple days, and we'll see what happens. Really? So this makes 3 doctors - 6 if you count ER doctors - who have basically told me to "wait and see" while I've been sick. So, I'm basically prepping for a colonoscopy without having the procedure. Dr. C told me I could mix the stuff with whatever I needed to so that I could tolerate it better. I mixed it with Sprite and that helped a little. But, I'm so flipping nauseous from it - I'm probably not drinking anymore of it, and I've only had 1/3 of it. I'm starting to gag as soon as I just smell the stuff in the glass. And yes, I tried plugging my nose. I can't swallow it like that - it irritates my gag reflex.

And because of all these damn doctors telling me to wait and see, we have to wait to have a baby. We will have to have a summer baby unless I (a) switch school districts to one who gives paid maternity leave separate from sick time or (b) wait 3 years to get 30 days of leave built back up. Even while trying to have a baby, it always seems like I'm waiting and seeing. We time having sex by doing OPKs and charting, and then we wait and see if it worked. When we started it was "wait a few months so your body can adjust to being off the pill and then see what happens." Once David started the Clomid it was "wait 3 months and see what happens." Seriously. I know having a baby isn't always a quick thing. Obviously, I understand that. We've been trying for over a year and a half. And now, we have to stop and wait and see if September will work for an IUI. David is waiting to go back on Clomid until April or May, giving us more than the 3 months of "waiting and seeing," but that gives us a window. He will also be taking the FertilAide daily starting in April. I'm going back to a regular prenatal, and then in August, I'll do the FertilAide but add anything that's "missing" from the prenatal since the formulas will be different.

We probably won't be going to California in June. I just don't think there's enough money in the budget. I lost one of my tutoring cases because his counselor - he's a foster kid - told the foster mom that he "had" to have somebody there consistently. I understand that. But, I'm pissed. That's $100 a week we're losing. The company told me they would get me another case when I was ready for it. So, I'm going to "enjoy" 2 quiet weeks with just my one case, and then I'll get another case. We owe the hospital so much money, plus we have credit card debt. We want to get out of debt, besides our house and student loans, so this it's probably better that we skip the reunion. But, I haven't seen my family in a long time, so I'm sad.

On the working page.... I spent 2 hard years working my ass off to get my ESL/ELL degree. But, because I'm not tenured, I have to wait until the summer and see if they will need an ESL/ELL teacher somewhere. I do like my school - not all the people, not all the time, but that's anywhere.... - but I feel like I'm wasting my master's degree doing Pre-K. I don't know if I should take stuff home at the end of the year or leave my stuff there. I know that it's still early - only the beginning of March - but I would love to know by the end of the school year. That way I could plan my school year easier!

Well, now that my stomach is in knots, my ass is on fire, and if you've actually made it through this, kudos to you! Thanks for listening! I'm done ranting about waiting and seeing. Hopefully my next post can be a little more optimistic!